Matt Chung's Site

Author: mattchung

  • My attempt to stop leaping out at 06:30am to pull out trash bins

    With my eyes still slightly shut, I slowly rose to consciousness this morning when suddenly, through the not so sound proof windows connecting my bedroom to the front garden, I heard the muffled sound of the dumpster truck slowing makes it way down the street. Based on decibal level of the metal claw wrapping its teeth around its current victim, I suspected that the truck was next door. Oh shit, I realized, I forget to wheel my own fully packed trash bins to the curb.

    I had …. maybe 15 seconds to the trash bin wheeled out to the front!

    Half naked, wearing only boxers, I leapt out of bed while still half-asleep sprinted towards the front door. I frantically twisted the knob, hopped over the two front door steps, gripped the handle of the trash bin, and began wheeling the trash bin behind me, anxiously wondering if I would make it out on time.

    Just as I reached the the street, the garbage man — a young lad who looked as though he was maybe 20 years old — said “Thanks mate”. I handed over the trash bin and he proceeded to position it such that the garbage trunk could connect its claw around the body of the bin.

    Now, this whole situation — of forgetting to roll out the bins on Wednesday evening, instead of Thursday morning — has happened not twice, but three times now, over the past 2-3 months. I’m not entirely sure what specifically changed in my life such that would’ve caused me to forget this weekly chore. Regardless,I’d really like to avoid these jump out of bed frantically instances. So, here’s one of the ways I am going to try and reduce the probability of that happening: adding an event to my calendar.

    Setting up an event in my calendar

    Just now, I added a recurring meeting on my calendar to remind me to pull the bins out at about 06:30pm every Wednesday. I maintain a calendar and have developed a habit, a practice, of checking it every day in order to see what’s on the horizon. If some event is coming up and not in my calendar, history has shown me that, chances are, I’m going to forget about it.

    Configuring reminders

    Now, not only did I add this recurring event in my calendar, I’ve setup my Fastmail settings such that now, by default, every time I add a new event to my calendar, the following reminders are automatically added, my phone (and laptop) showing an alert:

    • 1 day before the event
    • 1 hour before the event
    • 15 minutes before the event

    I find that these alarms are spread out sufficiently and give me little nudges, ways to warm up my mental cache for what lies ahead.

    Summary

    Will this weekly recurring event calendar help me avoid having to sprawl out of bed in the future and race to street while wearing boxers? I sure hope so. But we shall see.

  • Developing organizational skills

    The cycle of disorganization followed by organization

    Yesterday morning, I had a (often recurring) thought to improve my organization skills. I’m aware that this repeating desire comes in cycles, periods of deep disorganization, followed by frustration — frustration from being unable to find something I saved, frustration from dropping the ball on some project — ending with a crescendo of hyper-focus organization. This pattern, that I’m becoming more and more aware of, motivates me to approach this (not novel at all) situation in a more mindful way, especially after reading this hacker news quote from this pursuing the forums this morning:

    “[The Artist Way] is great for identifying underlying creative blockers and helping you discover if the current rut is the same rut repeated or something new“

    Sometimes, our problems tend to repeat themselves. And while nothing is wrong, per say, with a problem repeating itself, I do want to minimize the time I spend recycling the sames solution over and over. And instead of berating myself, and in spirit of a growth mindset, I ask myself: how can I learn more about organization and how can I develop more skill around organizing?

    Why get organized to begin with?

    There’s this baseline assumption I hold: that organization skills improve the quality one’s life. But is this rooted belief of organization helpful? Is it accurate? Is it true that acquiring additional skill may help me realize certain (personally, professional) projects?

    Breaking down organization into concrete buckets, into discrete skills

    Before jumping the gun (as I’ve done many times in the past, leaping to problem solving prematurely), I think it would be helpful in my situation to zoom out and break down organization into several skills. Upon creating these categories, it might be useful for me to then perform a self-assessment because by approaching this with honesty and compassion, I can then give myself what I need

    Different ways to bucket the skills

    Organizing Creativity

    Thoughts that pop up while writing this article

    • What role does knowledge of Reiss Motivation Profile (RMP) play as it relates to a fixed vs. growth mindset. How does my low desire for order impact my motivation to develop organizational skills
    • What are some resources (e.g. books, courses) have I tried in the past? What worked? What didn’t work? Where am I at now, in my journey?
    • What are the trade offs of developing organizational skills, of becoming more organized? Can I really have the “best of breed” approach, leveraging the (assume) creativity sparked from lack of organization?
    • Can I develop organizational skills that have less to do with how it looks — especially from the outside — and more of a growth internally? Similar to DBT, the behavior might look the same but the internal feeling is different

  • “Rethinking ambition” – Reflection on: Podcast episode by Maya Shankar with guest Jennifer Romolini

    While walking the pups this morning, I had a sudden urge to listen to a podcast and I pulled out my iPhone (13), launched Apple Podcast, and navigated to one of my favorite podcasts: A slight change of plans. After not listening to any of her podcast episodes for nearly a year, I scrolled down to an episode titled “Rethinking Ambition”

    After listening to the first few seconds, I momentarily considered skipping and swiping to another interesting, useful episode; I had the thought of “what could I possibly learn from an affluent, white, privileged woman talking about about ambition.” Damn, I was so wrong.

    I set my judgemental thought aside and proceeded to listen to the remainder of the 30 minutes (or so) episode (I admit, I’m a bit embarrassed for my judgemental thought however, as learned in dialectical behavior therapy, a thought is just that: a thought) and here are a few favorite moments

    Favorite moments

    Sliding her resume back towards the interviewer when he (somewhat) condescendingly asked “What school is this?”

    She was interviewing for an entry level position as an assistant for a media (I think magazine) company. Apparently, even for entry level positions, applicants tend to have graduated from pedigree schools (e.g. Harvard, Yale), and the college that Jennifer attended did not fall into that category. And I love her tenacity, her no shits taken response “Just because you haven’t heard of the school doesn’t mean it isn’t a good school.”

    Turns out, her no non-sense reply lead to her actually landing the job since that attitude, apparently, is part of what it takes to put out fires as an assistant. She valued her 10+ years working as a waitress and applied what she learned in customer service; this makes me wonder what sort of stories my own mom, who worked at a diner during her teenage years, would be able to share with me as well.

    Toeing the line

    Jennifer said she was of “toeing the [company] line” and that’s an idiom I’m not particularly familiar with it. Though I’ve heard the phrase before times in the past, I wasn’t completely sure what it meant and as it turns out, it’s one way to say that you follow rules and orders and behave obediently.

    New words I learned

    • repudiate – to refuse to accept or reject

    Quotes

    “Ambition is a force and you can harness that force for good or you can harness that force in a way that takes you away from yourself and things you care about. We think success has to be big when it’s so often, the most satisfying success is quiet and small…I’ve designed my life in such a way that nothing is neglected: my relationships, I’m not neglected, work is not neglected. Everything is in balance.”

    The above quote resonates with me because upon reflection, much of my ambitious endeavors in the past — for example, climbing up the corporate ladder at Amazon to become a senior engineer — contained a shadow, a slightly misunderstood (from my perspective) drive and ultimately, disconnected me not only from others around me, but disconnected me from myself and spiritual development.

    “I’m going through the challenges of life. I am riding them like a wave, much more naturally because I’m not gripping, nothing requires that hold on me.”

    The above quote reminds me of Oliver Burkeman and how he talks about (radically) accepting what lies ahead — that we are all finite human beings with a limited time on this earth — and with acceptance, we free ourselves from holding the brace position.

    “Is to have a spaciousness, I think that is success. And when work is all consuming and doesn’t have boundaries, and when you are chasing something inside of work that you’re honestly never going to find, you lose all of this other beauty, which is what a successful life really is.”

    Again, resonates with me in the context of work because for about 15 years of my life, I relentless searched for spiritual development within my work and I believe I was looking for the right thing, just in the wrong place.

    Summary

    Overall, solid episode 4.5/5.0 rating and would recommend listening to. Definitely left me in a pensive mood and had me reflect on how grateful I am for my current situation in life: working a 9-5 job with flexible hours that allows me to single parent my daughter and pursue creative opportunities (e.g. dance).

  • Carol Dweck’s Mindset – Chapter 1 & Chapter 2 Recap

    Is this book even for me?

    I was pursuing a bookstore — Waterstones, the Wimbledon location — and ended up purchasing Carol Dweck’s book titled “Mindset: Changing the way you think to fulfill your potential”, despite some initial hesitation. Before walking over to the checkout counter with book in hand, I picked the book off the shelf and skimmed the first couple pages and quickly learned that Carol Dweck posits there are two development mind sets: fixed and growth.

    “Isn’t it obvious that a growth mindset is better generally speaking and I definitely possess a growth mindset, right?”, I thought to myself.

    Turns out, like most things in life, it’s not so simple, not so black and white. In reality, as the book points out, there’s a general tendency for most people (me included) to possess a fixed mindset in some areas of our lives while at the same time, holding a growth mindset in other aspects.

    In any case, so far, even after reading only the first three chapters, I’ve already not only started questioning some of my beliefs, but also recognized that some parts of my life where I’ve unknowingly and unconsciously held myself back from even making an effort — even trying — certain activities.

    Two mindsets: fixed vs growth

    So, what is a growth mindset anyway? It is the belief that through through consistent effort, strategies and help from others, you can develop certain qualities (e.g. smartness). This mindset differs to that of the fixed mindset, that certain qualities are set in stone, unmovable, and a consequence of this belief we may end up experiencing “urgency to prove yourself over and over again”.

    With a fixed mindset, an individual’s underlying intention or motivation is driven to prove something about themselves. For example, say I consider myself “smart”. As a result of labeling myself as such, I may pursue certain activities that prove  — over and over again — to both myself and others that I am actually smart. Or I may end up avoiding certain behaviors all together out of fear of disapproving myself.

    In contrast, with a growth mindset, the main objective is to learn and growth. To this end, individuals with a growth mindset approach activities through the lens of learning, through applying effort.

    Captured Quotes

    “If you are somebody when you’re successful, what are you when you are unsuccessful?” (pg. 32)

    “Becoming is better than being” (pg. 25)

    The top is where t”he fixed-mindset people hunger to be, but it’s where many growth minded people arrive as a by-product of their enthusiasm for what they do.” (pg. 48)

    “The growth mindset allows people to value what they’re doing regardless of the outcome” (pg. 48)

    “What I mean is that even when you think you’re not good at something, you can still plunge into it wholeheartedly and stick to it.” (pg. 53).

    Self Realizations

    Avoidant behavior due to impact on (self-imposed) beliefs

    As mentioned above, I for sure thought that I held a growth mindset across all domains in my life (personal and professional) but reading this book puts me in deep reflection. Already, I’ve self-discovered that I tend to avoid crossword puzzles, drawing art with a pencil, Rubik’s cube, building physical objects with my hands, all because I don’t posses the natural gift or talent. As a result of lacking these possessions, I avoid pursuing these activities all together since distort an image — of “smartness” — I hold about myself.

    But now, it seems blatantly obvious that all those skills above — crossword puzzles, Rubik’s cube, building physical objects with my two hands — can be cultivated.

    So, what can I put into practice, now?

    Crossword puzzles? Rubik’s cube?

    We shall see.

  • On Oliver Burkeman’s 4,000 weeks: “Decide in advance what you want to fail at”

    The book “Four thousands weeks” by Oliver Burkeman profoundly impacted me when I blasted through reading it this past year and I’m currently considering picking up the book and reviewing my hand written annotations marked on each pages, notes I took: summaries, quotes, questions, etc.

    But before reaching to grab the book, the following thought emerged: if the average life spans 4,000 weeks and I was born in 1988, how many weeks left do I have left on this earth?

    Well, according to the date calculator website, 4000 weeks from May 16th 1988 (my birth date) lands on January 13th, 2152.

    Given that today is September 13th, 2025, that leaves me about 16,932 days left. Or, put differently:

    • 2417 weeks and 4 days
    • 46 years, 4 months
    • 556 months

    That’s … somewhat confronting.

    But from my current perspective, the above time frame, oddly enough, feels like a substantial amount of time left. I mean, sort of is.

    All the meanwhile, I recognize how precious and tender life is, how an instant, your world can turn upside down. So, I ask myself: how do I want to spend my remaining days?

    Or, perhaps if I take one piece of advice, a suggestion, from the Four Thousand Weeks appendix, I might want to “Decide in advance what to fail at.”

    Deciding in advance what to fail at, to me, makes me radically realize and accept that, as a finite human being, I have limits. I can’t “have it all”. And instead of sighing with disappointment, I breathe out tension, some tension in my body washing away. Right now, I’m resisting and fighting the urge to enumerate a long list of things I want to do however, for the purpose of this exercise, let’s list some of my pre-planned failures:

    • A stand up comedian
    • A magician
    • A father to additional children
    • A psychologist or psychiatrist treating patients with mental health
    • A principle software engineer for a major tech company
    • A famous book author
    • A world class break dancer
    • A digital organization dad
    • A touring DJ
    • A politician
    • A medical professional who works for “doctors without border”
    • A professor or teacher of children
    • A world class dog trainer
    • A touring dancer
    • An entrepreneur running a 7 figure business
    • Living quietly in isolation on a farm raising a bunch of animals

    The above list seems silly. However, at some point in my life, I wanted to do the above. And if I’m being honest, a part of me resists the idea of human limits and part of me is drawn towards working towards ALL of the above at the same time.

    But as I type these words out, trying to tackle more the a dozen ambitious goals in a single life time, seems ridiculous.

    And so while I no longer know exactly what I want to do with the remainder of my life, I do have a few ideas on how I’d like to spend the next few years:

    • Raising Elliott as a single dad – this has become my #1 priority in life. Had you asked me if I ever envisioned living as a single dad in a foreign country, I would’ve thought you were crazy. But here I am.
    • Dive deep into mastering myself within the craft of dance and contribute the street style dance scene
    • Work part time as a tech lead and sharpen skill set – prepare for the storm of artificial intelligence (AI) take over
    • Connect and limber my body and calm my nervous system down

  • House Dance 1:1 – Beauty in boredom & Gamification

    Today, I had a 1:1 dance private with Francesa Miles and while the initial agenda she had initially stitched together had us focusing on use of space — which we did go over — the dance lesson took an unexpected turn and I learned that some of the recent critique I’ve been receiving around my transitions (from one concept to another, or from one movement to another) stems from avoiding the discomfort of boredom. In addition to this realization, I also learned the power of creating mini games that serve both as a constraint and as a fun objective that also ends up manifesting some desirable movement qualities.

    Main takeaways

    • When thinking about engaging the chest and torso, consider engaging the back of the torso, the shoulder blades, an area often overlooked
    • Create little objectives, games that can spark or motivate certain movement qualities
    • Experiment with permitting myself to experience the feeling of boredom at least a couple times before transitioning from one movement or concept, to the next

    Follow up

    • Double time a step and accent every third step

    Double time consists of 16 counts and with a movement (e.g. pas de bourree) that consist of 3 steps, we can perform the movement 5 times and gives us one (half note) count before we return back on the “1”

  • House Dance – Tuesday Training (September 02, 2025) Recap and Reflection

    On making a choice and committing

    Tuesday training has been more or less running consistently every Tuesday for about 6 months now. Apart from the time period in which I was visiting the states, I’ve hosted this weekly session.

    And yesterday, I considered cancelling the session on the morning of, considered refunding everyone their 4.00 GBP because my right foot developed a blister that caused me to wince even when applying the slightest amount of pressure or weight.

    Although I have no doubts people would’ve totally understood and extended compassion had I cancelled the session, I feel a certain responsibility to keep the training running and at the same time, it’s a part of the day that I very much look forward to for multiple reasons.

    Trying to explore other options instead of cancelling, I momentarily considered designating someone else — perhaps Aubrey — could run the session. But in the end, I made the choice and committed and satisfied with the decision.

    Yesterday’s agenda

    • Warm up (shake it out) – a limbering exercise that I’ve come to love and I draw inspiration from Francesa Miles, who showed me this same exercise during our 1:1. Gives me the opportunity to, at least once a week, identify tension my body holds and to release it.
    • Foundation latter and repetition exercise – there’s 6 foundation steps/moves and we start with the first one, performing it for (2) 8 counts. At the end of that sequence, we tack on the second foundation for an additional (2) 8 counts, then “move back down the latter” and repeat the first foundation. We continue to stack additional moves at the end of every sequence and constantly move back up and down the latter.
    • A (light) circuit – jumping jacks, lunges (for them hip flexors), partner planks, skate jumps, burpees
    • Rhythm exercise #1 – we form a big large circle and each person takes a turn clapping a rhythm (for 8 counts, though we normally 4 counts) and then the rest of the crew dances and matches that rhythmic pattern
    • Rhythm exercise #2 – formed groups of 3 and each person would take a turn dancing an 8-count rhythm, repeated twice, and then the rest of the observers would guess the rhythm
    • Combo exercise – each person comes up with a (1) 8-count combo and then would freestyle in front of the group for about 40 seconds and during that time, inject their combo into their freestyle with objective to get other people to correctly guess their combo
    • Exchange in small groups – in spirit of increasing the amount of time for people to dance, instead of a single large cypher (sometimes we still do this, when the group is small enough like 4-5), we formed 3-4 circles with 3-4 people each

    On clapping for 8 counts instead of 4

    Intention setting

    At the beginning of every session, I ask every person attending what their intention is for joining, why they are here today, and what they might want to get out of the session. Like other previous sessions, there tends to me shared objectives and yesterday was no exception:

    • Simplicity
    • Turning inwards
    • Breaking out of default patterns
    • More expansive
    • Extension
    • Practice taking risks

    On breaking out of default patterns

    I no longer view the behavior of falling back to “default patterns” — movements that we often see people repeat in their freestyle dance — as something wrong or pathological. In my opinion, the repeated movement patterns form part of our identity. Secondarily, from a compassionate point of view, I think our patterns provide a safety mechanism, a sense of competency. Nothing wrong with that. At the same time, this implies that freeing ourselves from these default movements adds some discomfort. As such, for me, there’s a small desire to feel feelings of discomfort since that may serve as an indicator of growth.

    Evaluation of my own rounds

    I’m becoming less and less surprised with the fact that often, I’ll feel or think a round of mine isn’t “good” but when watching back, I’m quite pleased with what I see (of course, the inverse is true sometimes as well, where, in the moment I think it feels good yet when looking back, I cringe).

    Round 2

    It’s apparent to me that something is working or a combination of somethings are working: from a compositional perspective, elements of my composition have improved, most notably turns and (my desire) misdirection. These qualities are most evident in this round where, somewhat intentionally, I would deliberately disrupt the flow when performing a turn in order to redirect the turn in the opposite direction.

    When watching back the video, I giggled when others playfully laughed when I performed my combo (from the previous exercise) since I had more or less, very not subtly, cued everyone that my combo was about to be injected by me clapping.

  • House dance training log: reflection on the salsa step / hop

    Overview

    Decided to focus on Physical Qualities, expanding variety and vocabulary, by directing my attention to one move: salsa step. When I’m practicing, often so many thoughts tend to distract me and what I found particularly useful was leveraging the mirrors hanging up on the wall and with the erasable marker, writing down both

    1) what I want to work on and

    2) what I am actually working on.

    Although I sometimes stick to the former, I often will relegate control and follow what comes up organically.

    What got practiced

    • Direction changes with the salsa step, turning both left and right – reminded of Kev’s comment from last week, about working on one’s weaknesses
    • Double time of salsa step

    Observations

    • Looping double time transitioned me into a flow state, albeit how short
    • Established two “checkpoints” when performing the double time of the salsa step – on the “and” of the three, I initiate the salsa step on the opposite side (i.e. if started on the right, then we now step on the left) and on the “6” I begin terminating the sequence on the same side
    • Practicing the sequence (double time) at half-speed proved to be helpful – the memory of Rommel sharing (during the battling workshop that took place a couple weeks ago) that he regrets not spending more time practicing moves at half-speed lingered in my mind
    • Felt confident breaking away from prescriptions of how double time “should be” done – On the last count of an 8-count, I deliberately did not step on the “and” of “8” and instead ended on “8”
    • Maintaining a groove (hip swaying), while difficult, helped keep me on time when performing double time

    Summary

    Last night, I experienced (yet again) flow state: not too difficult, not too easy. Initially, double time for salsa step was frustrating, to the point of overwhelm. Aware of my tendencies to rush through this difficulty, I slowed down and was able to oscillate between a variety of speeds, slow and fast.

  • Soul Sync Workshop & Jam

    On Friday evening, August 22, I last minute minute to sign up for a workshop hosted by Alba and Princess, the workshop centered on freestyle dance: freestyle development, introspection, and connection. I was motivated to attend the workshop for a couple reasons. First, I simply wanted to dance, to move my body — not train — but just connect with myself. And having been to their previous workshop, felt the workshop’s environment would be a great atmosphere for turning inwards. Second, I consider myself an active member of the London freestyle house dance community and when I see other members of the community — Alba in this case — I want to show up and support them.

    Now, like any 3 hour workshop, there are a myriad of lessons we were taught and I want to enumerate a few exercises that resonated with me, ones that I’ll likely incorporate into my own dance practice

    A few exercises to takeaway

    • The eyes track what body part you are moving
    • Strike a pose and keep your arms in a fixed position while other parts of the body (e.g. torso, legs) move around those arms
    • Set intention with the eyes
    • During a round, breathe through the nose, then through the mouth, then hold the breathe

    Of the three, I would say that the most profound impact was the third exercise: setting intention with the eyes. Presently, I’m recognizing (and I’ve also been told in my feedback) that when dancing, often I am concentrating so intently that I end up (not intentionally, but as a byproduct of focus) hold tension in my upper body and my neck. And while I am lately directly releasing tension by actively relaxing, by adding a bounce, I also noticed that by simply intentionally directing my gaze on some part of the room (e.g. ceiling light, door knob, hinge on the door) that when I end up performing a turn, there’s much less tension being held in my body, including my neck.

    Coming in a close second is the strike a pose and maintaining a fixed point with the arms. This was the first time I’ve both heard of this exercise and attempted it and believe that I can probably apply this concept into my own freestyle rounds and as a constraint, the exercise can actually help unlock some creativity as well.

    Finally, Alba had shared an exercise less focused on composition and more on increasing one’s awareness of their breathe. During this particular exercise, we were prompted to dance and then she would cue us to either 1) breathe only through our nose 2) inhale through nose but exhale via the mouth 3) hold the breathe. I noticed in both my movement and noticed while observing others that, when we start off breathing through the nose and transition to exhaling through the mouth, the movements become more elongated. And another observation is that I likely sometimes hold my breathe because it became obvious that when holding tension, the quality of the movements become more staccato, more jerky.

    Summary

    The overarching theme of the workshop was what I would consider the double “C”: choice and commitment. For all the exercises (ones listed above and even the ones I didn’t share) revolve around these concepts. The two are essential ingredients, in my opinion. Sometimes, I myself make a move in my freestyle dance but it’s often not conscious choice. And as far as commitment of that choice, I think it influences perceived conviction — confidence — communicating that although you may not know where the movement choice may lead you, you’re confident enough to commit.

  • On taking ownership of dance and “chunking” during practice session

    Last night, I practiced at home for about 45-50 minutes, from the comfort of my own living room. I approached the solo practice session with some grace, my body still sore from the Tuesday’s Training session as well as the hip-hop class (my second one, from John Graham). Despite the muscle soreness, I was able to move my body and the intentions I set out last night were to practice the following:

    • Alternate rhythm for pas de bourree – over the past (3) private dance lessons I’ve taken with Francesa, we’ve been practicing switching between the kick and snare. One way to transition is by applying a “1+2+3” rhythmic pattern. So on top of throwing this (pas de bourree) rhythmic pattern in my round, I also wanted to incorporate an additional pattern “1+2+3+4”, followed by a drag and sweep movement. I would say that for these three “chunks”, I’m now in the skill execution phase and would like to practice deliberately injecting them into my freestyle rounds
    • Double time rhythm (on beat) transition to “On Time” – I’ve struggled with dancing double time because I had found it challenging to maintaining a bounce, my internal metronome. But it appears that the act of practicing (despite not immediately getting the movement) has someone reduced the difficulty of the exercise
    • The train movement – I really love the aesthetic (and sort of the sensation/feeling in my body) when executed by others and only up until recently do I feel my body (more specifically: my hips) can handle the load and so now I am practicing injecting the train into my freestyle rounds

    In addition to practicing each of the individual tasks above, I am taking Jo-L’s advice and attempting to “chunk” them together. That is, when I’m able to (without errors) consistently perform the “chunk”, I then try execute a subsequent chunk and build a string of chunks together. In addition to stitching chunks together, he had also suggested that when errors or faults show up, to pause in the moment, instead of continuing executing the move. The reason being that we may unintentionally repeating those faults.